Ex-DREAM THEATER Drummer MIKE PORTNOY: 'I Am Indeed VERY Sad Over All Of This'

Former DREAM THEATER drummer Mike Portnoy has once again taken to his official forum, this time to respond to an "open letter" from a fan who has accused Portnoy of "treating people like garbage" and coming across as "childish and immature and bitter" in the way he has handled DREAM THEATER-related questions and issues since his departure from the group. What follows are excerpts from the original fan "open letter" and Portnoy's responses to each of the points raised.

[To read the full "open letter," click here. Mike's response can be found in its entirety at this location.]

Portnoy: "Well, this is just absolutely insane...

"I have no idea what I said to insult everybody and how I ended up the bad guy here, but all this is EXACTLY why I am declining interview requests at the moment and why this is going to be my last post for a while...

"I was totally dreading being misinterepreted, misunderstood and misrepresented...

"I am really hurting badly over this....and this surely is not helping..."

[From fan's open letter] "How do you just press forward with deleting threads [on the MikePortnoy.com forum that have to do with DREAM THEATER] and pretending nothing happened?"

Portnoy: "Well, actually, that's how a lot of this started.....I DIDN'T 'press forward with deleting threads and pretend nothing happened' (although now I kinda wished I did). I posted my reason why, and perhaps THAT was a mistake... but I thought I owed it to you guys to explain why the threads disappeared."

[From fan's open letter] "Do you really think you are in the right here?"

Portnoy: "Honestly, I'm not exactly sure what I did wrong... I've always been very open, honest, genuine and don't beat around the bush or pull punches...

"I was hurt that I was removed from the [DREAM THEATER] site and I was hurt by the 'not sad at all' headline I read on Blabbermouth... [referring to a quote from a recent interview with DREAM THEATER singer James LaBrie in which James stated that he was 'not sad at all' following Mike's departure from the band. — Ed.] (granted, I didn't hear the whole interview and was just shocked by the out-of-context headline...). So for being duped by the media and speaking out on it, for that I am sorry as well..."

On being accused of "treating people like garbage lately":

Portnoy: "I honestly have no idea how I am 'treating people like garbage lately' either????? I have tried to be as respectful, delicate and sensitive as possible.... If anything, I have been the one taking a beating left, right and center... my Facebook, Twitter and other websites have been completely taken over by angry fans (f*ck [AVENGED SEVENFOLD], f*ck you, etc etc)...people who have obviously not read my reasons and simply on the attack....

"You have NO IDEA how hard it is to watch thousands upon thousand of these posts... when I have given my heart and soul to these 'fans' for all these years... and I am more hurt than they are right now.... yet still, I bite my lip and try my best to continue to be as respectful, delicate and sensitive as possible.... I'm treating THEM like garbage lately????? I'm still baffled..."

[From fan's open letter] "Please take a higher road and don't come off so childish and immature and bitter! I don't care if I get banned for saying all this, but you can't justify acting irrationally while saying "this is my site, I say what I want" thing. I have never seen so many people in complete disagreement with something you have said before. Maybe it's a sign to sit back, unplug that Internet connection and really think about where you are as a person."

Portnoy: "I will indeed do this... Marlene [Mike's wife] and I have talked about this and I promised I was going to not read this stuff anymore and let it upset me... or chime in and post anymore either (she's probably gonna kill me for posting this!),but rather than NOT responding to this 'open letter' and be perceived as somehow being 'immature, bitter or childish,' I decided to bite the bullet one last time, respond and properly sign off before disappearing..."

[From fan's open letter] "I hope you don't see this as me bashing you on any level. It's the honest assessment of what's been happening lately. I know you said that you hoped it wouldn't turn ugly. YOU started it."

Portnoy: "I'm still not sure how *I* started it???? My reaction yesterday was just that.... a *RE*action to an action (or two for that matter....even if one was 'out of context'). That's not 'starting'... that's 'reacting'...

[From fan's open letter] "Keep the private matters private. Best of luck."

Portnoy: "I do agree there as well... and it's probably nobody's business, but after reading that Blabbermouth headline, I e-mailed all four guys [in DREAM THEATER] and none of them ever responded.... (and they still haven't...).

"I would've loved to have kept it private and hoped they would've responded when I reached out to them all, but they never did... but then again, that's between us, so that's the last I will comment on that...

"So being James never responded to me personally and chose to do it 'publicly,' I'd like to publicly apologize to him for apparently misunderstanding his quote out of context and deleting those threads... (although I still cant understand why it's OK for DreamTheater.net to delete [Mike Portnoy] stuff, but not vise-versa....but it's OK....it's also the last I will comment on that as well!)

"And on that note, it is time for me to retire from posting for a while....

"Contrary to what many people are thinking and saying (both here on my beloved forum or other places where I am somehow now 'the bad guy'),I am indeed hurting over all of this.... contrary to yesterday's Blabbermouth headline, *I* am indeed VERY sad over all of this....

"These additional posts have already gone way too far (whether sensationalized by the media or simply read by the fans) and I need the three stickied threads (the press release, the Eddie Trunk interview, and my note to forum) as well as one upcoming exclusive interview with Prog magazine, to be all I say for a while....

"Even in these tough times, I love you all dearly and cherish the relationship that I have developed with you all for all these years....

"Please try to understand my situation and know it's been the hardest thing I've ever done....but it does NOT have to change anything between US!!"